2015 Newsletter - Volume 3
Kim Friesen - Mogillow Arts
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Hi and welcome to Volume 3 of my 2015 newsletter!

Welcome Spring

Wow what an awesome day it is outside today, weather wise, as I type this newsletter! A beautiful reminder of springtime and that I am so blessed to live on the West Coast. No snow to thaw, just a lot of cherry blossoms - or popcorn trees as my hubby affectionately calls them! Bring on all the flowers and flower baskets!

I think it's important for each of us, regularly, to take a moment to reflect on our personal contribution to society. I've noticed that to help us do that various days (even weeks) to celebrate genders have appeared on our calendars. Take advantage of these reminders! To all my female readers, I hope you had a wonderful International Women's Day on Sunday, March 8th and acknowledged what an important contribution you make to each person's life you touch!

Sunshine sure helps to clear the cobwebs out and make you feel alive, doesn't it? We celebrated Daylight Savings on March 8th too. I love having lighter evenings, but I admit I do miss that lost hour of sleep for about a week, lol!


I joined Pinterest recently and have been playing around on it. I think it would be safe to say that I'm addicted to the quotes! Sometimes a few words can say so much to me! They speak to me like a picture does; they inspire! Follow me at or check out some of my pins on my Pinterest page Kim Friesen - Mogillow Arts. I have more pins than just quotes ;)

Thank You!

Thanks to each of you for subscribing and reading my newsletters. I appreciate your support. 

A special shout out to my subscriber, Gina, who celebrated her "30th" birthday on April 2nd! Wow, you are just a spring chicken aren't you!

If you're new to my website and newsletters, greetings! I'm honored that you're reading my writings :) Check out my previous monthly newsletters and my other writings, anytime, on my websiteKim Friesen - Mogillow Arts.

In Gratitude,

Your face like porcelain
Taut and translucent
Delicious and dewy
A resplendent vision before me
So assured

Eyes cast forward
Divulge such frailty
A lost soul
Who searches

My heart feels your pain
It clenches, restless

The sound of silence
Tries to bring you to your knees
Dissolve you into a pool of emotions, blinded

My mind searches for a bridge
Down the corridors my thoughts travel
To the room 
Where the boat is perched in safe harbors
I pull it towards me

I promise
I will not let you go, like others
A warrior
I will defend you
Destroy the demons
Intent on your obliteration

Your mouth turned downward
Makes me yearn 
To paint kisses
Dripped with love
Across each wrinkled crease of woe
I so want to hug you
Allow my heartbeat to encompass you
Breathe into you the scent of hope

I want your soul to smile with mine

My limbs begin to
As I watch your fist shatter the mirror
Among the tears
My legs
Like the fabric doll
My auntie made for me
When I was five
I try to hold onto something
To prop myself back up
But the floor's surface
Beckons to overtake me

My heart beats, thunder
As my eyes
Like a stopwatch
The drops
Of blood
That rain downward
As your hands drop to your waist
And you stare forward

I try to reach out to you
But my arms
Are paralyzed
As the room begins to spin

I remember the dandelion you picked
That spring day in the meadow
How you blew softly upon the feathery pieces of fluff
"I wish I may
I wish I might
Have this wish
I wish tonight"

Shallow breath
I am drawn to look at you 

What do I even have to offer you?
Am worthy?

You turn towards me
Our eyes lock in a stare
As a single tear
From your eye
My heart, eternal

Spasms of apocalyptic nature
Erupt inside of me

Sounds rings through my ears, vociferous
Reminds me I am still in fact alive, buoyant
Hands grab hold of both of us
As we are shrouded
In this moment
Upon this cliff we dangle

Is your life flashing before you eyes now?

"Hush a bye baby, on the treetop,
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock;
When the bow breaks, the cradle will fall,
And down will come baby,
Cradle and all"

Voices interrupt
Their clamor violates my thoughts
As muscled arms
The feather
That floats in a spiral
In front of me
I watch, mesmerized
As each letter to each word 
To every sentence
Attempts to penetrate
And threaten the life line
I witness
As the unknown begs, blithe
To the silence
The warrior


The glare of the hospital lights, incandescent
The ugly beige curtains, drab
The hospital bed sheets, twisted
The sounds of laughter, palpitates in the hallway
The realization that nothing has changed

Foreshadows from the past?
Predictor of the future?

Checkmate in the game of life
You stare at your hands
As I stare at you
No mirrors close by

The snake in the grass slithers
Parting yesterday and tomorrow
Only you can answer
If it will take you away

© Kim Friesen
I would imagine there are days when Superman
wakes up, glances at his cape, and wonders
when someone will come save him.
I've Learned Something New

Since my last newsletter, I stopped and asked myself that very important question that I think everyone should ask themselves every once in a while. "Why?" Why am I doing what I'm doing? Why now? Why in this fashion? Why am I content here? Is it out of love, fear, guilt, belief, comfort, habit, fun, all of them, none of them? "Why?"

I'll share my observations of myself with you:

Why do I do what I'm doing right now? Well for me, that's an easy answer. I am now at a point in my life that I want to give back. I no longer need to keep the true "me" buried within. I answer to no one, I am the boss of myself and anyone wishing to be in my world must take my thoughts and feeling into consideration too.  Life is about living not just for the other person or person(s), but it's also about sharing and celebrating the unique inner beauty each of us can offer. The only person, of course, that can twist and contort this vision is my son. He like, everyone's children, gets an automatic free pass. He can do pretty much what he likes, I will always be his momma and will never turn my back on him :) I can't it's not in my DNA to walk away - credit given here to my mom!

After the countless hours of endurance and pain spent behind the walls of a prison within myself, I realized that it was in fact me who was keeping myself trapped there. One day I just opened the gate and walked out. I've never looked back.

Please know though that what is even more awesome than witnessing my own shedding, is witnessing the transformation of you. I'd be honored if you let me in on your magical journey :) My husband has stood behind me 100% during my times of shedding and I'm thankful to him, always. So, to pay it forward, I'd like to be there for you.

Please know that the reason I put my heart out there and allow you a glimpse into my inner world is because I'm brave. I would love a brave camaraderie to have fun with!

I offer you love, friendship and non-judgment, no strings attached.

For any of my readers old enough to remember the Mary Tyler Moore theme song, you'll know what the inside of me feels like right now. For those of you too young, I've put the lyrics down. I resonate strongly right now with them:

"Who can turn the world on with her smile? 
Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?
Well it's you girl, and you should know it 
With each glance and every little movement you show it 
Love is all around, no need to waste it 
You can have a town, why don't you take it 
You're gonna make it after all 
You're gonna make it after all 
How will you make it on your own? 
This world is awfully big, girl this time you're all alone 
But it's time you started living 
It's time you let someone else do some giving 
Love is all around, no need to waste it 
You can have a town, why don't you take it 
You're gonna make it after all 
You're gonna make it after all."

I realize that I'm caring less and less about what others think of me and instead am embracing just being me. I'm okay with allowing myself to see that I truly am a wonderful, beautiful and brave soul ;) Despite the fact that others opinions may differ. I will not allow others to discredit my belief in this. Their discredit is just their own projection anyways. I'm finding that I'm no longer interested in investing in people treating me like I am at fault. My philosophy for life is, "no more pretending". It may still work for others, of course, but it hasn't ever worked for me. I don't want to be a shadow who is put down for being someone they actually are not. Sorry, I will not be the person you "don't want to piss off as she'll tell you what she thinks."  In fact, I'm the person you "don't want to piss off as I won't be the personal carrier for all of your stuff you try and pass off as mine". Gotcha!


Disease is caused by being at dis-ease. I was reminded of this important lesson taught to me by mom years ago recently by a guest speaker, Tom Woloshyn, at a Wholly Fit's "gain some wisdom" night. Tom is a holistic health practitioner. The night equated to me being reminded that when I knot things up inside myself, it is similar to hanging an invisible noose around my neck and slowly allowing myself to die. Hm, I wonder why pain manifests in my neck region ;)
During that evening with Tom, he asked me what I felt guilty about since I was experiencing pain in my shoulder/arm. He said that pursuant to Louise Hay's teachings, my feelings are due to guilt. For the first time ever, I vocalized to someone other than myself that I felt guilty about my stroke. What was I guilty for? Well, I felt guilty for all the extra care and assistance I had to hope I'd receive from my husband. I felt guilty for those who left me, when I honestly did need them - despite the fact that others told them I didn't. I felt guilty for those who tried, but could only be partially present for me. Abandonment for me, on any level, can easily be tapped into considering my past with my biological father. I realized though that this guilt regarding me and my stroke is only manifesting itself as a physical pain to try and tear me down. It's actually not my guilt to carry or disperse. It's others guilt to deal with or not deal with, as they see fit. This has caused me such discomfort over the years and I now realize that I can no longer hold another's pain or thoughts. I need to be present and accountable 100% only to me. It's hard to believe that 11 years have passed since my stroke and I'm still feeling its emotional effects! But I want to share now that at last the stun gun went off and I am choosing to leave non-supporters in the past and the ones who show me love, I vow to open up more to. 

Yes, the stroke still impacts my day. Then again if you've had the whole back of your head opened up, it would make sense that this is a lifelong scar and not one easily forgot about. I am reminded every day I wake up where I have been ;) I'm also reminded how far I've come and what awesome feats I'm overcoming :) I speak loud and proud to assist you with your life long battles and the things that try to knock you down. 

The night with Tom also made me recognize that I'm now emotionally available to help others from being lonely who have just started their own journeys towards self-fulfillment.

Grab my hand, I'll help you stand :) Remember skeletons do not define us!

Have you asked yourself "Why" lately? Have you weighed the pros and cons, or recognized the benefits and also realized what toil it may be taking upon you? Go ahead give it a go. I think you'll be surprised at what you might learn about yourself.

I'm Not Done Yet

Last month, I featured the song I wrote Beauty and I realize that I'm not done sharing yet. So, the next one I want to share that I wrote is called, Promise To Our Hearts. I sang this song for Mae Moore at a songwriters' workshop, Red Cedars. Mae loved it - we actually only changed one tiny thing in the lyrics - the line that now reads, "Things have changed since you went away." This song will always remind me of you, Mae. Just like my song. Beauty reminds me of Shari Ulrich who I played this song for at that same songwriters' workshop. Shari had just lost her mother, so this song was a little raw for her to hear. Promise To Our Hearts is one of my favorites songs that I've written. Kind of timely actually that I am releasing my newsletter on Easter weekend when this song has the word Easter in it. Synchronicity at work . . . welcome my lifelong friend!

Once more, for those of you who can play guitar, I've attached the chords. For those who don't play, no worries, as once again this reads as a beautiful poem too :) 

Remember to treat each other with kindness - always. If love dies between you and a lover, walk away graciously. Concern yourself with the gifts of life lessons and wisdom you've gained over the course of the relationship. A door closes but a window always opens. Remember too that after any kind of disruption in our lives, it's you who decides where you will go with it and what person you will become from it. Not anyone else. Do yourself a favor and find a soft spot :)

G, D, C, D G
G                                 Em
The card you wrote at Easter
Am                            D
Lies staring from the desk
             G                                  Em
And the photo that we took last fall
        Am                           D
Lies face down upon the chest
          Am                  Em
In the hallway by the door
C                     D                        G                    D  
That door you walked out saying you want no more
C                     D                       G
What about the promise to our hearts
C                     D                      G
Why is this the ending not the start
C            D                        G
Why is it that love doesn't stay
C                      D             G
What is it that’s different today
C                       D                     Em
What about the promise to our hearts

G                                          Em
Our bed where you’ve been sleeping
Am                              D
Is imprinted with your shape
              G                           Em
And the sheets they're all in tangles
   Am                   D
A picture of your haste
           Am                        Em
In our bedroom down the hall
           C                D                  G               D  
In that room that I don’t wanna sleep in no more
C                       D                     G
What about the promise to our hearts
C                      D                     G
Why is this the ending not the start
C                      D               G
Why does love not wanna stay
C                       D           G 
What is it that’s different today
C                       D                     Em
What about the promise to our hearts
Am, Em, Am, Em, C, D, G

G                                    Em
The boxes with all your things
        Am                            D
I’ve stacked up beside my car
               G                Em
And as I stare at the pavement
                  Am                        D
Can't help wonder where you are
           Am                      Em
In this world that we live in
C                     D                     G             D  
This world that I don’t want to live in no more
      C, D, G, D, C
Yet I do
I do
C                       D                     G
What about the promise to our hearts
C                     D                     G
Why is this the ending not the start
C               D                      G
Why does love not wanna stay
C                  D                                     G
Things have changed since you went away
C                       D                     Em
What about the promise to our hearts
G                                 Em
The card you wrote at Easter
C                                    D
Your pillow and all your things
G                                        Em
Oh I’ve loaded into my car trunk
                   C                           D
With all the photos and all our dreams
        C    D     G    
And as I drive away
          C       D
I can’t help ,wonderin'
 C                     D                      G
What about the promise to our hearts
C                      D                      G
What about the promise to our hearts
            C                     D                      G
I guess love was not a promise to our hearts
C, D, C, D, G
© Kim Friesen

Spring Has Sprung The Grass Has Risen

"Spring has sprung
The grass has riz
I wonder where the flower is?
Here I are
Pick I up
I'm a little buttercup."

One of my best friends used to say this little poem to me every spring. I smile when I think of it. Spring is like a free gift from the universe, a re-charge time. I bask in its regenerative powers. After all, it makes way for warmer weather and as the weather changes, it also distinguishes all those nasty winter bugs and colds that can suppress us. I also rejoice at the return of outdoor boot camp in the sunshine!

Set Back

Well this last little while has been real trying on my exercise life. I gave myself a pretty bad 2nd degree burn steaming clothes and then I somehow got infected with pink eye - god did I look horrible! But this set back allowed me time to process even more of what I want out of my life in the next year. It's forcing me to pause. It reinforced that I need to change even more. It's time to grow again. The universe has this unique way of stopping me in my tracks just when I need it.  

Last year at this time, I was a lot more focused, a lot more "geared up". These past few months. I've felt myself more going through the motions. I'm finding that I'm questioning what it is that I hope to gain even deeper as well as pondering relationships. I have felt like I have been tested on my belief that I can better myself. I still love what I'm doing, don't get me wrong, yet I feel that something is missing. I don't know if I am not surrounding myself with enough likeminded people, if I should be reaching out more, if I've reached out too much and need to reign it back. I'm kind of in a funk. My twin brother, Shawn, and I now text every Saturday regarding our fitness, so I keep myself accountable to him. We also have a goal set this summer to go to the The Boulder Climbing Gym to conquer some of the over 13,000 square feet of climbing terrain. Yet, I still feel in my heart something is missing. I'm signed up for 3 Mud Mulishas and contemplating a 10-kilometer run in Las Vegas in November.
I'm hoping that the sunshine of spring will unlock my spirit, free me from the drama and let my inner self shine once again. With the little physical hiccups I've had I've really had to concentrate to not let it de-rail me. 

How about you, do you ever feel like giving up? Do you ever contemplate going in a new direction? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Drop me an email at, anytime!
Recipe To Enjoy

Wow this looks awesome - great for spring time lunches or for with a side to a piece of chicken or a steak! Check it out:

Better-than-Chipotle Bowl

Yield: 5 servings


1 onion, chopped
1 garlic clove, chopped
1 Tbsp lime zest
3 Tbsp lime juice (about one lime)
1/4 tsp. sea salt
4 Roma tomatoes, chopped
1 cup orange, red, yellow bell pepper, chopped
1 jalapeno, seeded and diced
1 cup black beans
1 cup frozen corn
1/2 cup cilantro, roughly chopped
2 tsp. olive oil


In a large bowl, combine all ingredients and stir well. Allow flavors to marinate for about 2 hours then serve and enjoy!

Serving Size: 1 cup • Calories: 145 • Fat: 1.4 g • Carbs: 26.2 g • Fiber: 7 g • Protein: 6.7 g • WW Points+: 3 pts

Are you looking for a boot camp to "be the best version of yourself" and live in Victoria, BC? If so, check out Wholly Fit's website at and sign up to join us. 
Last month I pointed you towards:

The quote: 
“If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.” ~ Paulo Coelho

The song, Every Breathe You Take, by The Police:

My article on my website, Kim Friesen - Mogillow Arts, that honors that I'm not a perfect person, Stand By Your Man.

This month I'd like to point you in the direction of the website MindBodyGreen and its article on Emotional Spring Cleaning. It's a fast read, yet very insightful (

I hope you give yourself permission to change the "you" inside of you, make yourself the best possible "you" can be. Don't worry, I understand that this does not come without fear, questions, insecurities - the age old question, "What if?" Regardless, I will be scared with you, like I did in the Tough Mudder obstacle, Walk the Plank - one of my biggest fears - let's just run and jump off the diving board together into the abyss of unknown!

I have been busy wring this month for Kim Friesen - Mogillow Arts. Yes, more poetry and also that darn eBook on my stroke. I admit, I'm having trouble with it. I know when the timing is right I will release it, and I know I've been stalling. There is no congruent reason for this, except that like I said above maybe I feel it will make me feel even guiltier to release it. That no one wants to read about one little person's plight with a stroke because they survived.  I just look at it, start typing and then get distracted. I've promised free copies to some people and I will honor what 'I've said but I just want to give a heads up. I hate the pictures, I hate the deep memories, BUT I know it will help me to release them. I am asking for your patience as I try to claim myself out of my wrings and memories :) I've come a long way with it in the last few weeks. I'm battling with some structural, computer issues, but I promise it is coming soon. I hope you will be interested in purchasing it or reading it if I gifted it to you.

Please know too that whether or not you're a subscriber, I'm always humbled that any of you take the time to read what I write. I don't have any editors or spell checkers reading my work. It's just me, so my sincere thanks for continuing to read :)

As always, please feel free to share my website, newsletters and writings with all of your friends and family. Encourage them to subscribe too. I promise I won't bug them with junk mail or anything of the sort!


I saw three eagles in the past three days. To anyone who knows me, they know I LOVE eagles and animal symbolism:

When an eagle appears, you are on notice to be courageous and stretch your limits. Do not accept the status quo, but rather reach higher and become more than you believe you are capable of. Look at things from a new, higher perspective. Be patient with the present; know that the future holds possibilities that you may not yet be able to see. You are about to take flight.

All I can say is HOLD ON I AM READY!

Happy Easter to those of you celebrating!

Until next my next newsletter take care,

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Kim Friesen - Mogillow Arts
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