VOLUME 20, 28 AUGUST 2015
It was Sunday morning. The trees were swaying, the birds were chirping, and the Screechers were purring.
It was, of course, Super Sunday.
In true AUFC fashion, 75% of the participants were hungover, and after 30 minutes, 100% of the participants were more lubricated than a cucumber at Jimmy Mader’s house.
After taking a pledge from MC Clinton ‘David Guetta copied my look’ Rule, the Blacks were ready to take the plunge.
From then on in, most of the day is a blur. When recounting Super Sunday, it’s always funner to look at where certain members of the Blacks fraternity ended up.
Ben Smelt and Ash Di Silvio ended up in a DIY Chinese all you can eat restaurant on Gouger street.
Alex Bate and Cameron Gregg ended up at the Arab Steed, terrorizing the families and small children who were there for a peaceful 6:30pm family meal.
Hugh Mugford ended up on the median strip out the front of the Havelock after being asked to leave, and decided the best way to inconspicuously re-enter the premises was to turn his shirt inside out and go through the front door. It didn’t work.
The most pleasing thing about the day though, is that AUFC left the Havelock unharmed. During the afternoon, it was unearthed that Salisbury North were within umpire abusing distance of the brave Blacks- as they were kicking off their end of season festivities downstairs at the same pub.
Another factor to most of our 2-day hangovers was the soiree held at the Long Room on Saturday night.
Nick “check out how stretchy my jeans are” Beneke gave us his best rendition of NSYNC, in a dance routine as arousing as a Kim Kardashian home movie.
This week, it’s finals time for 3 of Bob Neil’s Army.
At 12:15pm, The B Grade head to Payneham to kick off their finals campaign in style. They now boast the most deserved association medalist since Shane Woewoedin, so  get down to see the lads in action.
At 2:15pm, The B@stards head to Pembroke to wipe the self-serving smile off the privileged faces of Adelaide’s silver spoon brigade. Hopefully Tom 'the gorilla' Seagrim can match his Super Sunday performance.
May Bob Be With You.
Finals Fixture

Saturday 5th September

Super Gav and the Budgie Smugglers (Div 1R) v Ross & Trevor @ Goon Park (Payneham Oval) 12.15pm

The Chardonnay Socialists (C1) BYE

The B*stards (C2) v Pem Broke Down @ Don Haslem Oval (Haslam Oval) 2.15pm
The Scum (C3) v Scotch on the Rocks @ Rock Reserve (Scotch College Oval) 10.15am
Bob Neil’s Girl Guides BYE
Bob Neil congratulates Kalon Green in jointly winning the Div 1R League B&F Medal. Well done also to Callum Rohde and Tri Hung Nguyen, runners-up in C1 and 7R respectively.


Adelaide University Football Club Presentation Dinner 


 Friday 16th October 2015
(6:30pm drinks for a 7:00pm start)
National Wine Centre, 
Corner of Hackney Road & North Terrace 
All inclusive 3 course meal & drinks 
Special guest Graham Cornes 
(AFL & SANFL Halls of Fame, ex Blacks Player)
Dress: Cocktail

Ticket pricing is as follows:
Player: $100
Player and Partner: $180 
General: $120
General with Partner: $200

Purchase tickets online at
by 9th October

Sponsored by 
Thesinger and Turner Travel Associates 


Blacks Look-A-LIKES

We've been trying to find a way to stitch up Eddie 'Teflon' Dadds since the start of the season, and finally found ample material in the form of 'Chubby Dadds' pictures. Chubby Dadds, meet Jonah Hill, your doppleganger.


Gavin Cragg aka Cyclops from X-Men.


Every bloke at training has been that bloke "yep Greggy ahh f@rk Vicks-DAWGS". Both however would also be that bloke you would be talking smack to at 3am at Ladyboy Go Gos whilst indulging in a dart and you don't even smoke. A white dove also told the Subby that the only way a difference between them has been felt is when they do the girlfriend swap….

Please send through to football@theblacks.com.au


Div 1 (Black Jack & the Showgirls) 17.15.117 defeated Port Red Light District 8.7.55
Goal Kickers: B. Smelt 4, B. Borg 3, J. Willis 3, T. Bateman, D. Bateman, N. Beneke, L. Antoniadis, M. Quin, S. Paynter, K. Flanigan
Best Players: E. Dadds, J. Noonan, D. Cunningham, K. Flanigan, D. Bateman, N. Langridge
Div 1Reserves (Super Gav and the Budgie Smugglers) 13.17.95 defeated Port Red Light District 5.6.36
Goal Kickers: E. Hewish 5, J. Fladrich 3, D. Robinson, T. Muecke, J. Watson, J. Stewart, R. Anderson
Best Players: E. Hewish, A. Offe, J. Fladrich, P. Dolan, K. Green, Z. Melzner
Div 7 (Sexy Pimp & the C-Men) 8.7.55 defeated by Mitchell Car Park 9.6.60
Goal Kickers: J. Fitzgerald 2, M. Fitzgerald, B. Lewis, A. Ireland, S. Ritchie, A. Riley, M. Jamieson
Best Players: D. Trezise, T. Nihill, T. Milton, A. Riley, S. Bondio, M. Fitzgerald

Div 7Reserves (Robert Reid and the Brady Bunch) 5.11.41 defeated by Hout & About 11.13.79
Best Players: C. Baker, C. McMichael, M. Schutz, R. Laidlaw, T. Nguyen, C. Ramsey
Div C1 (The Chardonnay Socialists) 15.6. defeated Henley On Drugs 7.10.52
Goal Kickers: D. Blyth 3, D. Jean 2, L. Rogers 2, B. Meier 2, C. Lane, A. Vallelonga, C. Rohde, M. Beilby, D. Arkun, J. Richards
Best Players: J. Richards, R. Doecke, C. Schiller, M. Heath, C. Rohde, L. Rogers
Div C2 (The B*stards) 11.15.81 defeated Gepps Double Cross 4.3.27
Goal Kickers: S. McNeil 2, W. King 2, H. Woods 2, B. Larsen-Smith, T. Seagrim, B. Collins, B. Hill, A. Bate
Best Players: W. King, A. Buckby, H. Mugford, H. Woods, A. Bate, F. Jamal
Div C3 (The Scum) 13.8.86 defeated Robert Mitchum 6.6.42
Goal Kickers: A. Howard 4, P. Malinauskas 3, N. Lawrence 2, W. Legrand, N. Vezis, M. Eisenberg, C. Rule
Best Players: S. Musolino, W. Legrand, P. Malinauskas, S. Lawrence, M. Eisenberg, T. Dean
Open Women’s Div 2 (Bob Neil’s Girl Guides) 4.7.31 defeated Angle Fail 3.2.20
Goal Kickers: F. Clancey 2, T. Lee, J. Power
Best Players: K. Holliday, M. Wilsdon, N. Burns, N. Newbery, L. Kenyon, T. Lee
Match Report of the Week

The C-Men were primed to take on Mitchell Car Park in the prelim final at Beautiful Bob Neil #2. Talk of grand finals and going one better was shelved, the bandwagon was abandoned and the focus at training was razor sharp.
Finals fever was alive and well at Park 10 on Saturday. Alan, Two Bucks, Vickers Gin, Ronan and a few others got behind the BBQ to feed and water the masses from The Double Cross, Out n About and Mitchell Car Park (who graciously funded three footy trips – snags and onions and cold red cans will open anyone’s wallet) while the Bastards did their stuff in an elimination final victory and the Brady Bunch gave it their all in a shattering prelim loss.
The C-Men seemed well prepared for the game. Arrival was punctual and a fine young trainer was kept very busy attending to genuine pre-game needs. The game started at a fair clip and continued to be played that way for the whole day. Momentum shifts were pivotal and there were plenty. After taking a while to settle, the C-Men got on top early to lead by 3 goals to one just before quarter time. A late goal to the Car Park (who really need a clash jumper so they can be told apart from the turf) swung the momentum their way. A further three goals to one in the second quarter had the visitors 5 points up at the long break. Mitch B!tch pulled in a screamer in the goal square to slot the C-Men’s goal for the quarter. Buoyed by his heroics he then thought he had more party tricks than older brother Gerald when gathering a contested ball in the pocket, spinning out of a tackle, selling some candy, ignoring Gerald alone and in a paddock at the top of the square and snapping over his shoulder to barely register a behind. One highlight reel moment at a time, young fella!
Amid high tension the Pimp let the young C-Men have it en route to the rooms at half time. Bad had they been that bad? To the boys credit they ignored the rant and responded to control the third quarter. The midfield lifted and gave the forwards opportunities and the Nihilist, Alan and Two Bucks were impassable in the back half. The Astrophysicist peppered the sticks to kick a goal and a couple of Penetrator specials (a.k.a. minor scores), the Pimp redeemed himself with a goal to finish off some excellent inside-50 defensive pressure from Turbs and the Forehead Lewis showed his class to kick one from a tight angle. At the last break the C-Men led by a point and had the momentum.
Gerald Fitzjarrad got the C-Men off to the perfect start in the last quarter, kicking a ripper from the boundary in front of the Blacks faithful to finish of some excellent team play. 7 points was a decent lead given the low scoring nature of the game, but there was a long way to go. The Car Park lifted their intensity and after a period of sustained pressure and clever use of the ball through the middle of the ground finally kicked a goal to bring the margin back to one point. The C-Men responded and defended valiantly, giving every contest their all. In the end it was an act of arse that was their undoing. Disciplined until the end the defenders punched a long ball towards the boundary, only to have a Car Park attendant soccer it between 10 pairs of legs and the big white sticks to put the visitors five points up. With just two minutes remaining the C-Men counter attacked but couldn’t produce the score they needed. After a tremendous effort of which the boys should be proud, the season ended in nail-biting heartbreak.
We don’t play for admiration…
In a game where all 22 players gave their all, Tom Milton was outstanding and BOG for the second week in a row and well supported by Toby Nihill and Steven Bondio in the backline all day. Mitch B!tch, the Penetrator and the Astrophysicist also made the BPs. Gerald FItzjarrad was the leading goal kicker with two (and celebrations worthy of a dedicated You Tube channel).
I give my thanks to the players, Lenny Pascoe, Wayne Abrey for being there every week, all our other support staff and the family and friends who came out to watch us play during the year.
Good luck to all teams remaining in the hunt for premiership glory and see you around the Blacks.
BPs on sporting pulse are wrong:
Best – Milton, 2nd Bondio, 3rd Nihill, 4th M Fitz, 5th Riley, 6th Trezise.
Goals: J Fitz 2, Ritchie 1, Riley 1, M Fitz 1, Lewis 1, Jamieson 1, Chooka 1.

Netflix and Hill

20 minutes in to Netflix and Hill and he gives you this look:

Beneke and Grieger get TURNT

The long room has never hosted the Backstreet Boys till now. Never has it experienced an NSYNC BYE BYE BYE like last Saturday.

Red square locals. Shooting Blades of glory. Get around them.


Never p*ss off an angry Irishmen/scottishmen

If you have ever played football with Darragh you know when you get tackled by him there’s a 66.66% chance that your health insurance premium will get paid out in full. RAA have an insurance policy called the angry irish/Scottish man erected in his honour.

Dan “The Predator” NotPrecise unfortunately received an atomic wedgie from the Irishmen/scottishmen which left his boxers eradicated. The Predator in his divine wisdom that comes to him once a month, decided to rock the eradicated boxers as a fashion item. The Predator’s mental capacity remains a myth.


First Nobel Prize winner to win the C-Men Best and Fairest

Dom “Double D’s” Davis is currently in the nether regions of the Switzerland underground in the classified high security area, working with the Large Hadron Collider – cutting shapes and solving the mystery of dark matter. We hope this message finds you well mate. You won the B&F with only 6 games. Must have solved the mysteries of dark matter. Cudos.


Flick of the Week

The Green Mile

Congratulations to Kalon 'Kermit' Green in taking out the Division Best and Fairest award for Div 1R. This doubles Greeny's medal count after coming equal team best and fairest. Kermit has certainly gone the extra mile this year, having pre-match conversations with the umpires and being on a nickname basis with most of them. Kalon must have known he had this award on lock when three games in the umpires were giving free kicks to "Greeny". Make no mistake however, Kermit completely deserves this award, in a dominant year where he has proven that 'leading by example' on field trumps fancy pre-match speeches (or even just moderately coherent ones).

Footy Trip? A Ned Dart Holiday?

When you book with Thesinger & Turner Travel Associates, a percentage of your holiday will go back to The Adelaide University Football Club to go towards prizes, competitions, club member awards and fundraising initiatives.

Fancy a vino? - 3 mixed dozens for Blackers - thanks to our mates Angoves

Our friends at Angoves Family Winemakers have put together 3 fantastic mixed dozens for the Blacks. See the attached form for details, really encourage you to get involved in this as $20 from every cash sold goes straight back to the Blacks.

Balaklava Cup with Daryl Braithwaite - DISCOUNTED TICKETS FOR BLACKERS


Are you on the lookout for a new Home Loan or possible Refinancing?

Or just want to have a no obligation chat to someone about your existing loan setup? 

Then look no further than James Storer from Bank SA. They have put together a great deal for community clubs, including the AUFC, whereby 0.4% of the initial loan balance goes directly to the club.

James is a Premium Lending Manager in the North Adelaide branch who also happens to be the grandson an ex Captain of the Blacks (Robert Elix). 

For more information please, contact James on the details below or click here for more information. 

BankSA Partnership contact
James Storer
0481 416 777

Chardonnay Socialists Fundraiser

The Chards are raising money for their spiritual leader and club legend Darien ‘Dirty’ O’Reilly who is going through a bit of rough patch at the moment. Please help support us by grabbing one of these Entertainment Books and $13 will go towards fundraising. Not only do you support a good cause but you also get some awesome discount’s at some of Adelaide better pubs and restaurants like ‘The Hackney’, ‘The Wright St Hotel’, ‘The Goody’, ‘The Wellington’, ‘The Austral’, ‘The Kentish’ and our home ground ‘The Havelock’. So get behind us and grab yourself a book or digital membership now.

Take advantage of free postage to ANYWHERE IN AUSTRALIA
For a limited time only we are offering
FREE POSTAGE to your door!

Click here for free postage.

You’ll also be supporting us in more ways than one! Every Membership purchased through our order page gives us a chance to win a $1,000 WISH eGift Card too! IT’S A WIN WIN!

If you have already purchased your Entertainment™ Membership this year – THANK YOU! Please feel free to forward this email to your friends and family. Every Membership sold helps our fundraising!

Buy Online now

A/B Grade Guernsey Numbers

The A and B grade playing list (with Guernsey Numbers) is available here for those who have requested player numbers when attending games. There are a number of players moving in and out of these teams but we have done our best to cover most players. However, we do apologise if this is not all encompassing of the potential Div 1 playing squad.


Get around the Blacks LinkedIn page. 

Click here or on the above image to get at the PAGE. 


Please send through to football@theblacks.com.au


The TEAMS for the Weekend.

*PS we endeavour to be perfect, but the teams may not be up by the time you receive this email. Click to view.

Black Jack & The Showgirls​

SuperGav & the Budgie Smugglers

Sexy Pimp & his C-Men

Cal Reid's Team Needs a Name

The Chardonnay Socialists

The B@stards


Round Date Opponent Venue
1 18/04/15 Rostrevor OC Cambelltown Memorial Oval
2 25/04/15 Sacred Heart OC University Oval
3 02/05/15 Portland Port Reserve
4 09/05/15 Henley University Oval
5 16/05/15 Salisbury North University Oval
6 23/05/15 Payneham NU Payneham Oval
7 30/05/15 Tea Tree Gully University Oval
8 13/06/15 Goodwood Saints Goodwood Oval
9 20/06/15 Port District Largs Reserve
10 27/06/15 Rostrevor OC University Oval
11 11/07/15 Portland University Oval
12 18/07/15 Henley Henley Memorial Oval
13 25/07/15 Salisbury North Salisbury North Oval
14 01/08/15 Payneham NU University Oval
15 08/08/15 Tea Tree Gully Pertaringa Oval
16 15/08/15 Goodwood Saints University Oval
17 22/08/15 Sacred Heart OC Sacred Heart Senior College
18 29/08/15 Port District University Oval











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