VOLUME 20, 28 AUGUST 2015
Super Sunday.

Super, deriving from the Latin for “above, over or beyond”.

Sunday, deriving from the Old English word, Sunnandæg, meaning “Strippers, beers and banter.”

Put them together, and we’ve got one hell of a weekend on our hands.

Book Monday off work. Send an apologetic pre-emptive message to all contacts in your phone of the opposite s@x.

And most importantly, make sure nobody from the substandard engine room sees you doing anything untoward.

Special mention this week must go to Jack Grieger. Jack has publicly stated that he doesn’t read the substandard because it is “too long, and doesn’t have enough pictures”

There you go Jack. The first picture just 100 words in. Given Jack can’t read, he might be a bit confused as to why his picture is in the newsletter. One of his teammates can explain it to him.

This week, we’ve got a plethora of home games. BN#1 has a triple header, as does BN#2, and the Chards wrap up their minor round over on BN#4 at Park 9,
Which makes it, fittingly we feel, a  S@X-TUPLE HEADER on BN#1 and #2.

One man who is gone from our shores but not from our hearts, is the Casanova we refer to lovingly as Fritch Mancis. Fritch recently went to a dinner with Jay Weatherill to celebrate a scholarship that he had been awarded. The dinner was going swimmingly- Fritch was rubbing shoulders with the who’s who of politics and business, and was seemingly giving them all a preview of the ol’ Mancis charm that we’ve all come to know and love.

Unfortunately for Fritch, things went a little TOO well. After having a successful conversation with a high powered businessman, which ended in the swapping of phone numbers, Mr Mancis took himself to the bar to have a celebratory drink. One celebratory drink turned into two, which turned into four, which turned into gonorrhea. 

Fritch Mancis ended up doing a walk of shame through Kuala Lumpur,  with his belt in his hand, and his dignity no where to be seen.

Come back in one piece Fritch- and remember, AUFC footballers make the best godfathers.

Get around the club this week- especially the 3 do-or-die finals on BN#2 (Park 10) from 10:15am.

May Bob Be With You.

Bigger than...

Bigger than BJ up forward.
Bigger than Tom Milton cutting shapes at Go's Gos
Bigger than Hamish Crouch's wrist injury.
Bigger than Bob Neil....wait too far.

The point is - this weekend is a colossal weekend for the mighty Blackers

This Saturday Daytime (29 August) -

At Bob Neil # 1
  • It all kicks off with the Scum in a Qualifying Final at 10:15
  • B grade at 12:15 playing for a finals spot
  • A grade at 2:15 with Div 1 guaranteed for 2016 so they can really express themselves in this game (flying wedge maybe?)
It is also Family Day so would encourage all the kiddies to come along….bouncy castle will be there from 1:30
At Bob Neil # 2
It is a do-or-die finals triple header
  • Starting with the B*stards at 10:15 
  • Then the Brady Bunch at 12:15
  • And then the C-Men at 2:15
Bob Neil # 4 (Park 9)
  • the Chardonnays finish their regular season at 12:15

Saturday Night -

At Bob Neil # 1
  • Girl Guides at 7pm playing their first ever finals game, with Hold your Bowlies in the Long Room and gourmet bbq & yiros on offer

SUPER BOWLIES at the Long Room from 6pm

$25 will get you a drink card and a meal voucher from the Yiros Stand.
Normal bar facilities will still be available.


Sunday August 30 - SUPER SUNDAY!

$20 to enter upstairs at the Havey

Teams name their best and fairest. Last one standing.
No further explanation required.

Monday August 31 - Liver detox kits available for sale.
(or you could just harden up)

Bob Neil still wears Volleys.

He hasn’t donned the footy boots in a while. 

The Blacks’ very own superhero Captain Sapsasa fashioned a unique pair of footer-slippers in his secret laboratory and workshop, hidden deep beneath the Uni Oval grandstand. 

A pair of Volleys with sprigs, for playing football. When first trialled in a game they immediately demonstrated their superior performance. As if by magic, the wearer’s ability to kick the football suddenly mirrored that of Bob Neil in his pomp, with the typical punt being a twenty-five metre floater that would bewitch and bewilder the opposition player to whom it was inadvertently directed. Of course, it was a cunning tactical ploy when Bob did it. 

The Sprig Volleys are also famous for being the only items worn by Captain Sapsasa in the Uni Scum team photo later that year, when he appeared in full body paint, depicting the Blacks’ famous playing ‘strip’.

Yours Sincerly

Action Man
Round 20 Fixture

Saturday 29th August

Black Jack & the Showgirls (Div 1) v Port Red Light District @ Bob Neil #1 2.15pm

Super Gav and the Budgie Smugglers (Div 1R) v Port Red Light District @ Bob Neil #1 12.15pm

Sexy Pimp and the C-Men (Div 7) v Mitchell Car Park @ Bob Neil #2 2.15pm

Robert Reid and the Brady Bunch (Div 7R) v Hout and About @ Bob Neil #2 12.15pm

The Chardonnay Socialists (C1) v Henley-On-Drugs @ Bob Neil #2 12.15pm

The B*stards (C2) v Gepps Double Cross @ Bob Neil #2 10.15am
The Scum (C3) v Robert Mitchum @ Bob Neil #1 10.15am
Bob Neil’s Girl Guides v Angle Fail @ Bob Neil #1 7pm

GREYS game this Sunday, August 30th @ Riverland – CANCELLED due to Super Sunday


Adelaide University Football Club Presentation Dinner 


 Friday 16th October 2015
(6:30pm drinks for a 7:00pm start)
National Wine Centre, 
Corner of Hackney Road & North Terrace 
All inclusive 3 course meal & drinks 
Special guest Graham Cornes 
(AFL & SANFL Halls of Fame, ex Blacks Player)
Dress: Cocktail

Ticket pricing is as follows:
Player: $100
Player and Partner: $180 
General: $120
General with Partner: $200

Purchase tickets online at
by 9th October

Sponsored by 
Thesinger and Turner Travel Associates 


Blacks Look-A-LIKES

On the odd occasion where Pooish kicks a few goals you definitely hear about it – he hires Ashley Ireland's Humming pigeons to spread the word and posts on his blog tumblr.com/greekgodwhogetschicksandkicksgoals. His ego inflates like PopNFresh below. You poke him, the big ball of dough and glazed yiros - and he giggles. Pooish  also indulges in many different fraternities in the off season, as does his ego puff up so does the body weight- another striking resemblance to PopNFresh. 

Meg the 'Meat Eating Vegetarian M.E.V' tops the league in team-mate high fives. If you are ever feeling down, that hand will always be raised.

Please send through to football@theblacks.com.au

Planisme Financial Solutions was established to help Financial Planning practices with their ever increasing administrative and regulatory burdens.

Whether it is paraplanning support, practice consulting or practice development support; Planisme Financial Solutions are here to help.

Round 19 Results

Div 1 (Black Jack & the Showgirls) 16.11.107 defeated Sacred Fart 12.8.80
Goal Kickers: B. Smelt 6, K. Flanigan 2, B. Borg , D. Bateman , W. Paynter , J. Willis , S. Penniment , N. Langridge , M. Quin , J. Noonan
Best Players: R. Agnew , K. Flanigan , M. Quin , N. Langridge , B. Smelt , J. Noonan
Div 1Reserves (Super Gav and the Budgie Smugglers) 11.10.76 defeated Sacred Fart 8.6.54
Goal Kickers: E. Hewish 4, R. Anderson 2, B. Sanders 2, D. Robinson , A. Offe , J. Dearing 
Best Players:  A. Offe , D. Robinson , J. Connell , B. Simpson , E. Hewish , J. Stewart
Div 7 (Sexy Pimp & the C-Men) 6.5.41 defeated Hout and About 12.17.89
Goal Kickers: T. Milton 2, F. Slape , A. Riley , S. Nankivell , A. Ireland 
Best Players: T. Milton , J. Cmrlec , J. Fitzgerald , B. Carroll , A. Ireland

Div 7Reserves (Robert Reid and the Brady Bunch) 15.7.97 defeated Saint Paul 8.9.57
Goal Kickers: C. Reid 6, A. Roberts 3, C. McMichael 2, J. Greeneklee , A. Jeyakkumar , P. Smith , T. Carr 
Best Players: C. Ramsey , C. Reid , S. Hickey , D. Conier , J. Greeneklee , Q. Daly
Div C1 (The Chardonnay Socialists) 12.9.81 defeated Port Red Light District 7.2.44
Goal Kickers: D. Jean 3, B. Meier 3, D. Blyth 2, J. Richards 2, S. Parker , A. Vallelonga 
Best Players: , C. Schiller , A. Vallelonga , R. Doecke , S. Parker , B. Meier
Div C2 (The B*stards) 2.6.18 defeated by Pem Broke Down 11.13.79
Div C3 (The Scum) 6.4.34 defeated by Fos Williams 11.6.72
Goal Kickers: A. Howard 3, P. Malinauskas , D. Currie , D. Tofan 
Best Players: , W. Legrand , S. Lawrence , R. Sheridan , J. Maxwell , D. Currie , A. Howard
Open Women’s Div 2 (Bob Neil’s Girl Guides) 3.3.21 defeated by Angle Fail 7.8.50
Goal Kickers: F. Clancey 2, T. Lee 
Best Players: , L. Kenyon , C. Thomas , S. Holliday , C. Tsoumbris , T. Nguyen , K. Holliday
Match Report of the Week

Div 1Reserves (Super Gav and the Budgie Smugglers) 11.10.76 defeated Sacred Fart 8.6.54
Goal Kickers: E. Hewish 4, R. Anderson 2, B. Sanders 2, D. Robinson , A. Offe , J. Dearing 
Best Players:  A. Offe , D. Robinson , J. Connell , B. Simpson , E. Hewish , J. Stewart
The B-spotters travelled to Adelaide’s inner south, beyond the flatulent Middle School and pulled up at SHOC’s spiritual heartland of Mitchell Park Oval. Considering the actual tenants had been training hard at the reservation for a Div 7 elimination, the deck was in remarkably good nick considering the midweek precipitation. Once horticulturalists Mader Mess Of It and Harvey 2 Face signed off the south western gridiron goalpost footing acceptable for play, we prepared with solid levels of Richard Sherman trash talk to represent.
The team runner ranted with multiple F-bomb expletives about being down at quarter time the previous 4 weeks, and we promptly extended our streak to 5 for some more catch-up footer fun. Partly Kermit’s fault for losing the toss and going against a 2-3 goal breeze, but the Smugglers were up and about nonetheless.
Mojo returned in the second quarter punctuated by a 50m bomb from Greg Anderson as we took the lead, but tragedy struck the Gloyne Hobbit with a 3rd hamstring twinge in a cuppla months that threatens to put the kaibosh in his season. Spewish kept the Farts in it with a rush of blood play on 10m out (not quite Stevie J style), and attempted reverse punt over the noggin both going to the sheizenhouzen!

Avoiding the sweatshop changerooms at the half, whatever SuperGav said worked as we produced our equal best premiership quarter (Sinners away) for the season to pump through 4.1 to 2.3 into the breeze as a brilliant Buck hunter snag seized momentum as Divots and Nathan Lyon set shots split the middle and a red hot group hit lemons up 3 with the aid of a dying breeze coming home. With the adductor tendon hanging on by a sinew, Harvey 2 Face gutsed it out manfully at CHF while Divots dominated the ruck… and general play for that matter.
The pumped up Farts responded from a spray to slam on a sausage immediately in the 4th, but the class of the mighty Blacks prevailed and we poured on the next 3 snags to wrap the game up emphatically. Play of the day on the clubrooms flank saw Nathan Lyon take the game on, bounce the T.W. twice before hitting Colonel Sanders lace out in the pocket. The 12th herb & spice raised twin calicos as the cheeky f*cker suggested to his direct opponent that a new defender was on the cards!
SHOC slotted a couple in garbage time to wallpaper the cracks as the victorious magoos celebrated knocking off the top team away. Bowlies jugs went to the Offe spinner who put on a masterclass of balanced 2 sided footer for 4 quarters in a blinder, ably assisted by Shoeless Joe and Homer Simpson with midfield grunt… the latter less than impressed by 2 late holding the ball decisions. Congratulations to the Showgirls who maintained the script to make it a Black day out for SHOC and keep our proud club in the top flight in ’16.
The next big decision is how to deal with Judas Quin, after playing a corker in his promotion to the big club! Next stop, the Maggies at beautiful BN#1, must win to play finals. Spring is in the air… there’s a tinge of blue on the sky at 6:00 pm start training… the smell of freshly cut grass is becoming addictive… it’s a great time to be involved in footy.

''Netflix and Gill'

This move has a 1/3 hit record. It is up there with the ""naked man".

However, we are not all blessed with the dimples and complexion of the great man.

Nick also recommends Sleepless in Seattle as the movie of choice....

Tales from the Chards

Hydration specialist reporting for duty on Saturday. If it wasn't said well enough before by Anthony Vallelonga, smash these Kents otherwise no high quality H2O will be delivered.

Punching out a cheeky run with the boy. Missing footy. ‪#doingitforbenruss‬‪#rehab‬ ‪#nogaypinkshoeslikeslipper‬

Slipper a man who does not mind a bit of colour – goes with his flamboyant nature on skill and the sleek Tony Montana haircut – in our minds looks like this when he goes on field. He loves his pink fluro eyesight blinding boots.

Photo of me being all business 
enjoy the rain tonight lads, I'll be jogging along the Darwin esplanade in 29 degrees..


Flick of the Week

The Artist
Submitted by Sam Penniment

As teams march towards finals, much like this years B grade, many players receive all the praise and attention, think Josh “The Dark Knight” Stewart, Kalon “Fight Club” Green or Jacko Dearing, Elliot Hewish and Ben Sanders a.k.a. “The good, the bad and the Ugly.” 

Some players (and films), however, go unnoticed, much like a Harrison Gloyne's "Southpaw" punch on an opposition runner. Only need to think of “the inglorious basterds” in Jimmy Mader, Brett Simpson and Michael Quinn to realize this. The best example of this in the b grade squad, however, is Aidan “The Artist” Offe.  Understandably the film connoisseurs amongst us may wonder how a film that won an Oscar is underrated, similarly how a man regularly polling in the best can also be underrated. Its because, much like Offe’s on field artistry, beyond those close to the B-grade or the film industry have actually seen it, choosing instead to watch the mass-produced mastery produced by the a-graders. 

Rumour has it that Aidan did in fact audition for the Artist during his Football hiatus recognizing how perfect he was for the role. Unfortunately Directors decided against casting him as he apparently ‘didn’t talk enough for the role.’

Footy Trip? A Ned Dart Holiday?

When you book with Thesinger & Turner Travel Associates, a percentage of your holiday will go back to The Adelaide University Football Club to go towards prizes, competitions, club member awards and fundraising initiatives.

Fancy a vino? - 3 mixed dozens for Blackers - thanks to our mates Angoves

Our friends at Angoves Family Winemakers have put together 3 fantastic mixed dozens for the Blacks. See the attached form for details, really encourage you to get involved in this as $20 from every cash sold goes straight back to the Blacks.

Balaklava Cup with Daryl Braithwaite - DISCOUNTED TICKETS FOR BLACKERS


Are you on the lookout for a new Home Loan or possible Refinancing?

Or just want to have a no obligation chat to someone about your existing loan setup? 

Then look no further than James Storer from Bank SA. They have put together a great deal for community clubs, including the AUFC, whereby 0.4% of the initial loan balance goes directly to the club.

James is a Premium Lending Manager in the North Adelaide branch who also happens to be the grandson an ex Captain of the Blacks (Robert Elix). 

For more information please, contact James on the details below or click here for more information. 

BankSA Partnership contact
James Storer
0481 416 777

Chardonnay Socialists Fundraiser

The Chards are raising money for their spiritual leader and club legend Darien ‘Dirty’ O’Reilly who is going through a bit of rough patch at the moment. Please help support us by grabbing one of these Entertainment Books and $13 will go towards fundraising. Not only do you support a good cause but you also get some awesome discount’s at some of Adelaide better pubs and restaurants like ‘The Hackney’, ‘The Wright St Hotel’, ‘The Goody’, ‘The Wellington’, ‘The Austral’, ‘The Kentish’ and our home ground ‘The Havelock’. So get behind us and grab yourself a book or digital membership now.

Take advantage of free postage to ANYWHERE IN AUSTRALIA
For a limited time only we are offering
FREE POSTAGE to your door!

Click here for free postage.

You’ll also be supporting us in more ways than one! Every Membership purchased through our order page gives us a chance to win a $1,000 WISH eGift Card too! IT’S A WIN WIN!

If you have already purchased your Entertainment™ Membership this year – THANK YOU! Please feel free to forward this email to your friends and family. Every Membership sold helps our fundraising!

Buy Online now

A/B Grade Guernsey Numbers

The A and B grade playing list (with Guernsey Numbers) is available here for those who have requested player numbers when attending games. There are a number of players moving in and out of these teams but we have done our best to cover most players. However, we do apologise if this is not all encompassing of the potential Div 1 playing squad.


Get around the Blacks LinkedIn page. 

Click here or on the above image to get at the PAGE. 


Please send through to football@theblacks.com.au


The TEAMS for the Weekend.

*PS we endeavour to be perfect, but the teams may not be up by the time you receive this email. Click to view.

Black Jack & The Showgirls​

SuperGav & the Budgie Smugglers

Sexy Pimp & his C-Men

Cal Reid's Team Needs a Name

The Chardonnay Socialists

The B@stards


Round Date Opponent Venue
1 18/04/15 Rostrevor OC Cambelltown Memorial Oval
2 25/04/15 Sacred Heart OC University Oval
3 02/05/15 Portland Port Reserve
4 09/05/15 Henley University Oval
5 16/05/15 Salisbury North University Oval
6 23/05/15 Payneham NU Payneham Oval
7 30/05/15 Tea Tree Gully University Oval
8 13/06/15 Goodwood Saints Goodwood Oval
9 20/06/15 Port District Largs Reserve
10 27/06/15 Rostrevor OC University Oval
11 11/07/15 Portland University Oval
12 18/07/15 Henley Henley Memorial Oval
13 25/07/15 Salisbury North Salisbury North Oval
14 01/08/15 Payneham NU University Oval
15 08/08/15 Tea Tree Gully Pertaringa Oval
16 15/08/15 Goodwood Saints University Oval
17 22/08/15 Sacred Heart OC Sacred Heart Senior College
18 29/08/15 Port District University Oval











Facebook Womens Team
Facebook Womens Team
Copyright © 2015, Adelaide University Football Club

Ground Floor, George Murray Building, Gate 10, Victoria Drive, University of Adelaide SA 5005

unsubscribe from this list    update subscription preferences